Word of the day: poopie

It has been a poopie morning. Literally.

I've changed four poopie diapers before 1 p.m. Two in the span of 20 minutes. One at a playdate and again one after lunch. This is clearly my penance for not changing a single diaper all long weekend long. (Dear husband is on diaper patrol during the weekends). Darling daughter has reached the age where she will tell me if she's got a poopie diaper by saying, "poopie, poopie" over again until we head upstairs to rectify the situation. Last night, I could hear her say, "poopie, poopie" in her sleep. (I did change her. No poopie diaper. I guess she decided to wait until morning to do her business.)

We aren't yet at the potty training stage. She's sat on the potty. Can say the word potty. Can indicate when she has peed and pooped, but she isn't in the active potty training stage. She isn't exactly ready. She'll get there. I'm in no hurry.

So today must be a record for dirty diapers. Can't remember the last time we've had four sizable poopie diapers in one morning. Obviously the cheese she has been eating in recent days hasn't bound her up. Hopefully the afternoon will be poop-free. If not, hopefully she can hold off until 5 p.m. when dear husband comes home. I've already reached my poop limit.

Horrifying but fascinating at the same time

They say the definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results. I'm sure we can all think of things we do in our life that we do the same over and over again, hoping the results will be different, but they never are.

In my household, one of the things that comes to mind that fits that definition is vacuuming. The only carpet we have is on the stairs leading upstairs and downstairs. Every time dear husband vacuums the stairs, I have high hopes that they will be clean. While they look relatively less dingy and grimy when he puts the vacuum away, they are still dingy and grimy.

Well, this week we bit the bullet, laid out several hundred dollars and bought a Dyson. Before making our purchase this week, I always wondered Dyson lived up to the hype. Well, I am impressed.Very impressed. The above photo is what the Dyson pulled out of the carpet that covers both stairs.

We were both horrified and fascinated at the dirt in the bin. (Dear husband remarked that he always thought the stairs were "clean" when he was done vacuuming. Obviously they weren't). Every time I vacuum with the Dyson it is like a science experiment. I'm always wondering what it will manage to suck up. I even vacuumed the keyboard of my laptop. Along with the dirt, it sucked up a couple of keys that I had to rescue from the bin.

I'm not surprised that the Dyson was able to pull that much crap out of the carpet. We have laminate flooring throughout the house and controlling the dust bunnies that I often find rolling underneath the beds and crib is an ongoing task. I don't want to give the impression that the Dyson was able to restore my carpet to its original state (it is cheap carpet and it is looking quite worn), but my stairs are looking incredibly less dingy and grimy.

I want to stress that we didn't buy the Dyson to clean the cheap carpet on our stairs. We bought it for dust control. In particular to control dust mites as well as to eliminate their habitat. After cleaning the stairs and the downstairs foyer, I tackled our mattress. For those who have dust mite allergies, one way to control those allergies is trying to eliminate the source: dust mites as well as their fecal matter. Unfortunately, humans attract dust mites. They feed on flakes of the skin we shed. (I know disgusting). Obviously, they flourish in areas where we spend a lot of time, like our bedrooms.

I won't get into too much detail of what the Dyson was able to pick up from the mattress, but I was amazed and disgusted at the same time. Honestly, I should have kept the plastic bag the mattress came in.

Buying a Dyson was a good investment for us. Not only does it control dust, it almost makes cleaning fun.

One call to Telehealth that I never ever want to make again

It was bound to happen that darling daughter would eat her own poop.

I should have known something was wrong when she suddenly went quiet. Soon after waking up from a 2 ½ hour nap yesterday afternoon, I could hear her chirping in her crib. I took my time responding to her as I was finishing some last minute tasks. When I walked upstairs, she wasn’t chirping anymore. When I walked into her room, my mouth was literally hanging open at the disgusting scene in front of me. Her diaper was half hanging off her butt. Poop was smeared all over her bed sheet. It was all over her right thigh and both of her hands. And worst of all there were poop smears around her mouth. Some how either her diaper got loose or she opened it to examine its contents. Either way, the outcome wasn’t good.

Earlier in the morning, I had given darling daughter prunes to help her clean out her system. She seemed constipated and obviously the prunes worked. I tried to do a very quick clean up so I could get an emergency bath ready. I’m not good at bath time as it is dear husband’s job. But there was no time to wait. Holding her from a distance, I plopped darling daughter in the bath water and started scrubbing. All the while I was washing the dirty, black stains off her skin, I started worrying about the potential ill health effects a baby could suffer after eating their own poop.

After washing darling daughter and getting her dressed, I was faced with a health problem. What exactly are the health issues surrounding a baby eating poop? I wondered. So I consulted with the Internet. I should know better than trying to get health advice off the Internet. After getting conflicting advice, from it’s okay if a baby eats their own poop to a baby could seriously sick, I decided to call Telehealth Ontario. Luckily I got a registered nurse right away. I feared getting the receptionist, who would ask me what my health issues was. I could just imagine me trying to squeak out the following: “ah, yeah, my baby just ate her own poop . . . I’d like to talk to a nurse about that . . .” Regardless, it was an embarassing conversation. Here is the rundown of what was said:

Me: “I was just wondering what the possible health effects of a baby eating poop. I think my one year old ate her own poop after she decided to examine the contents of her diaper after her nap time.

Nurse: Is she suffering any symptoms?

Me: (Confused as to what symptoms a baby could suffer after eating their own poop.) Ah, I don’t think so. She seems to be in good humour.

Nurse: Is she turning blue? Does she seem to be breathing okay?

Me: (More confused). Ah, no.

Nurse: (Laughing). Kind of disgusting, isn’t it? I think you are okay. They should be okay if they ate their own poop.

Conclusion of the conversation is this: if your kid eats their own poop they should be okay. If they eat someone else’s poop, then it becomes a questionable situation.

(I should mention that I was beat red after the end of this conversation as I was sooooo embarrassed).

So the moral of my story is this: the next time darling daughter goes for a nap there will be an onesie on her body. She will never go down for a nap with only a T-shirt and an exposed diaper again. Obviously it is just too dangerous and messy, too.

Copyright 2009 -- Valerie McLaughlin -- All rights reserved

The diaper genie . . . is it a scam?

I have a diaper genie. In fact, I have a diaper genie II. I bought it when darling daughter was about six months old. I finally broke down and bought one when our Safety First diaper pail was no longer useable. I had no problem when the plastic insert that kept the garbage bag closed broke a month after we bought it. I continued to use it. However, I did have a problem when the lid broke. What is the point with a diaper pail that lid no longer doesn't close? Back to Babies R' Us it went.

I must say the diaper genie works great. It holds darling daughter's dirty diapers. The problem I have is the plastic bag refill cartridge you need for it to properly work. It seems every time I turn around, I've got to change the refill cartridge. And those refills aren't cheap. They are about $8 each. So potentially I could be spending $32 a month to dispose of disposable diapers. (Ha, ha, the irony). I guess this is what I get for choosing disposal diapers over cloth diapers. (The debate over cloth diapers still rages in my household. However, that is separate blog entry for another day).

So not only did I pay Playtex $35 for the diaper genie, I've got to pay $8 a week, give or take, to dispose of my dirty diapers. That works out to be a whopping $416 a year. Ouch. I think I'm going to be sick. There must be better way. (I know the better way is cloth diapers, but like I said, the subject is still being debated in my household). I see a challenge. I'll have to give it some thought and see if I can come up with a solution.