Waddling into toddlerhood

In recent weeks and even days, I'm more aware that darling daughter is no longer a baby any more.

She seems bigger. She babbles constantly. She is saying a few words clearly, including her all-time favourite: daddy. She has given up her morning nap. She is becoming more independent. We attended a Halloween party on Saturday and she didn't want anything to do with me. She spent the entire party walking around, stealing toys from other kids and exploring the surroundings around her.

One of her favourite pastimes now is poking at her belly button. She discovered her belly button last week and since that time she has been poking at it constantly. She is absolutely fascinated by it. Sometimes she'll babble to it. In my books, that isn't baby behaviour. That is definitely toddler behaviour.

In recent days, we have been asking myself how did my baby get so big? Where did the time go? Those newborn baby days seem like they happened a lifetime ago. When I look through a Babies R Us flier now, I think she has outgrown most of the items advertised for sale. I'm not ready for darling daughter to become a toddler. But it is happening. This past summer, darling daughter and I would go on regular walks on nearby walking paths. During some of our walks, we'd encountered a 15 month old little boy. There was a striking difference developmentally between the little boy and darling daughter, who was about 12 months at the time. He just seem so much bigger, so mobile and so unbaby-like, compared to darling daughter. She is a couple of days shy of her 15 month birthday. Now she seems so much like that little boy -- bigger, mobile and unbaby-like. I can't ignore the reality anymore. We are waddling into toddlerhood kicking and screaming. And it isn't darling daughter who is doing the kicking and screaming. It is me.

I don't want to imagine what she'll be like in a month or six months from now. I'm trying to cherish every moment of her waning babyhood. It is hard, but exciting at the same time. But I'm not looking forward to the terrible twos.